Joe.
About 'Joe Babineaux'[]
Joe Babineaux was a regular black kid growing up at school. He had mediocre grades each year, but that didn't stop him trying. Or eating.
Joe had a favorite and of course best friend, named Mellie. She had grown up with Joe, and was like a sister to him. A cute friendship, from the age of four had now blossomed into a still-strong one at the ripe age of 17, and the two of them had become 'eating partners'.
Each week after getting paid, Joe & Mellie would visit the local KFC to fill up on the glorious chicken they'd be served. Each of them would spend over $50 per visit, and become friendly with all the workers. This did however, get dangerous after a while. Mellie got severely fat, while Joe piled on the pounds too he did try walking to work to balance out the fatty food, but it didn't work. Joe was heartbroken when Mellie died of a heart attack a year later due to obesity. Joe took to spending ALL his money on KFC as a result, depression kicked in and Joe became angry at life, and everyone else.
This normal boy had turned sour, and started to bully others at his local College. This led to lot's of fights, daily almost. Joe had hospitalized over fourteen students in one month. He still visited KFC after finishing work, once a week, and spent over $100 per visit this time for himself. Joe was spiraling out of control. He soon lost his job and was living off of the $3000 he had saved into a savings account. By living off, we mean spending the usual $100 a week on KFC. The money didn't last long. His parents were the only ones that could reach him, or were they? Joe had changed, now wearing a cap and claiming his own 'gang' (pictured).
Angeline and Joe Sr. sat Joe down. They told him he MUST lose weight and get another job, as his life was going to surely end one way or another. Joe simply sat there, chewing on a chicken wing not listening to his parents. He fought back with words, telling his father that he too had lost his job.
You lost your job too, Dad. Don't act like I'm the bad one here you prick Joe said. His father told him off for swearing, but then dropped his head as he knew Joe was possibly right. Joe's father had been applying for various construction jobs but found nothing; his experience seemed to count for nothing!
This was also the day things changed for the worst. The day Joe came to the Mansion.
During the conversation, Joe was slaughtering his poor father with words, and ended with Get a god damn job, DAD!
At this point Angeline was crying her eyes out, with Joe Sr. almost in tears, trying to calm his bawling wife down while trying also to argue back with his fat, depressed, annoying son. Joe's father replied with
It ain't that easy, Joe!
At this point, Joe snapped. He had heard enough. He wanted to prove to Mellie that he wasn't a useless fat slob. He jumped on his father and crushed him under the sheer weight of his stomach. Joe Sr's face was flattened on the floor with his brains leaking everywhere. Angeline was now in shock, still crying and screaming too.
Shut the fuck up you whore! Joe shouted. He then belly-flopped his own mother too. Both were dead instantly.
Before the Cops arrived, we had our MRE (Mansion Recruitment Employee's) visit Joe and (airlift) him to the Mansion. He now sits in room #50, surrounded by endless supplies of KFC. He will never die of a heart attack due to the vitamins and water pumped into his body by tubes and pipes. Joe is now over 50ft tall, weighing a whopping 110 tonnes.