Barry Slaverina once said, "If I ever see a UFO or Alien, I'll eat my own shit. They aren't real. Even if they were real, they wouldn't be able to breathe on our World anyway."

Though his point is relative and fact-based, Barry spent the whole of last night eating his own shit. Today, he is suffering from abdominal rejection meaning his intestines are trying to recreate and digest the shit he ate. As the shit is already digested, it now sits in Barry's stomach like a puddle of acid, bubbling and burning in his stomach bag.

This is because he lost the bet. He did see an Alien, in fact, 4 Aliens and they all greeted Barry as Humanely as possible.

Now registered under the newly introduced and brand new Alien Ward #1. The first of its kind, lives the 'Class 2000.X-Uii' Alien family from the Planet X-'v, in a Solar System far away.

This place is totally unknown on our Earth, and sits an enormous distance of more than 1,000,000,000 (one billion) Solar Systems away.


The current year on the Planet X-'v,


The X- is one of the 'Species' that inhabit the Planet, and 'v, is the Planet itself.


The Planet is a v shape, and marked at the Northwest and Southeast of the Planet are X-'v,'s two Moons.

The Aliens here at The Mansion are insanely intellectual. They have told us that in their World, the population is so scarce and dangerous that the X- specie live only on the Moons. Other species include X/ and X~ and they live on v of 'v,, a peaceful community and nothing like the X-.

Meanwhile at The Mansion, we spoke to the X- Beings and discovered why they would come here, respectively. The 'elderly' Alien named 7\^ said, ''This is the only Planet we X- can breathe on. Earth. Furtherlymore, we see every thing: in every Planet, in every Solar System. We know about The Mansion of Delight's as it's the only unmarked place on the face of your Earth. Our secret lies here."

A well-homed family, the X- have made themselves comfortable high up in The Mansion at Roof Level. The nameless baby X- has tried Earth milk and apparently has a bewildering thirst for it. The rest of the family don't really talk much, but every now and again one of them laughs out loud. We later found out they communicate through oxygen particles stating, "You Human are lightyears away from doing this."

Barry, appearing to look better was about to hear some bad news. Part of his original bet, "They wouldn't be able to breathe on our World anyway," he was wrong yet again. We and the X- decided together to make Barry eat more of his own shit for being incorrect. His night will NOT be a good one, and his morning - even worse.